Transcript - Episode 6: The Day We Met? (Part 1)
Audio for The Day We Met? Part 1
The Day We Met? Part 1
Wed, Sep 17, 2025
“Push the Roll with Ross Bryant” is produced for the ear and includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
Ross Bryant 00:00
So once again, we find ourselves facing the blank sheet of paper. We have no idea what's about to happen. We're going to take our title from our erstwhile listeners and scheme up a whole scenario on the fly, totally off the top. Let's get into it. Cup, what do you have for us?
cuppycup 00:18
Alright, so as always, we have a lot of great suggestions, and the one we've landed on today is from Sig-Free and Coy on patreon.com/pushtheroll, and the title is "The Day We Met?" with a question mark at the end.
Paula Deming 00:37
Oh!
Ross Bryant 00:39
That's very open-ended. It sounds like a late 90s, mid-2000s Nicholas Sparks sort of romantic dramedy to me. [laughter]
Paula Deming 00:49
Yes.
Ross Bryant 00:51
Or maybe almost even like a Hallmarky type of romance.
cuppycup 00:55
That's Scott's specialty.
Scott Dorward 00:57
Oh God. [laughter]
Rashawn Scott 01:00
Like the Prince of Christmas is actually your long-lost lover, and The Snow Queen gave you amnesia. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 01:08
Yeah. Yeah, you're a high-powered architect coming to spend the week back in your hometown.
Rashawn Scott 01:16
And all you brought was one briefcase. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 01:19
Yeah.
cuppycup 01:20
Amazing.
Ross Bryant 01:21
[MUSIC: melancholic guitar theme] The cosmos is a cyclopean infinity of chaos, infinite branching paths stretching off to vistas in the distance that will drive the mind mad. Shall we shrink in the face of all this? Or will we climb aboard the chaos and ride it to the end, letting chance guide the way? This is Push the Roll. We're rolling dice against your Patreon suggestions to create improvised Call of Cthulhu adventures in real time with themes of eldritch horror, the weird, the transhuman, the transmundane, the cyberpunk, the splatterpunk, the anything punk. We don't know until we roll. Anytime, anyplace, anything can happen when you push the roll.
Ross Bryant 02:17
So rom-com, romantic kind of vibes we're dealing with. It's interesting to play this with an ensemble of four players, because, of course, these stories usually follow one couple. But I think it's coming to me now that there is a type in these movies or these properties where you have like a party, so to speak, and that's when our heroine comes back to her apartment, and she's got her crew of friends, the people who are encouraging her and like making her over and being her sounding board for all her romantic woes. [laughter] And maybe that's who we are.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 02:55
"The Charmed Ones," my group of girls call ourselves. [laughter]
cuppycup 03:01
I'm looking through my generic character sheets. You said 90s, right?
Ross Bryant 03:04
Yeah. Or maybe let's... I like, the challenge of early 2000s.
cuppycup 03:09
Oh, okay.
Scott Dorward 03:09
Okay.
Ross Bryant 03:10
Let's think we're almost in the world of, like, "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days," or something like that. [laughter]
Paula Deming 03:16
Yes. I mean, honestly, such a good rom-com. It's really...
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 03:20
"Failure to Launch," "He's Just Not That Into You."
Ross Bryant 03:24
Yes, yes.
Scott Dorward 03:25
I have seen none of these. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 03:31
Have you seen "Love & Basketball," Scott?
Scott Dorward 03:33
Umm, I... [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 03:35
Have you seen "Brown Sugar?"
Scott Dorward 03:37
Uhhh.
Rashawn Scott 03:38
Okay.
Scott Dorward 03:38
Hmm, okay. I may be out of my depth. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 03:42
Last time we did this, we played in the 1890s and Scott's decadent fin de siècle references were deep and rich.
Paula Deming 03:50
Yes. Yes.
Ross Bryant 03:51
And so turnabout's fair play, Scott. Now you have to be... [laughter] So let's think of our party as like, our investigators so to speak, are types of characters that would be in one of these rom-coms. So think of like urban young professionals, fun and flirty. [laughter]
Scott Dorward 04:10
Oh God.
Ross Bryant 04:10
Everybody has jobs like working for fashion magazines or architecture firms or advertising agencies, things like this.
Paula Deming 04:20
I have an Author character sheet here that I was thinking could be fun. So maybe I'm like, oh, oh, I'm a children's book author. So just like quirky enough to be a friend character in one of these movies. Yeah.
Ross Bryant 04:36
You know what another sort of genre to pilfer from that just struck me, since we're a group is, "Sex and the City."
Paula Deming 04:43
Yes.
Ross Bryant 04:44
Speaking of characters who are authors.
Paula Deming 04:46
Yes.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 04:47
Yes, yes, yes. Carrie Bradshaw. I'm thinking like an up-and-coming fashion designer.
Ross Bryant 04:53
Awesome.
Rashawn Scott 04:54
Any time my girlfriends need something for a special event, they always know I can whip something up, make something out of nothing, these bed sheets, these curtains, these dumpster diving items. [laughter] Yeah, like a Rachel, who came from money, and is trying to do, like a...
Paula Deming 05:08
(as a character) I can work a real job too!
Ross Bryant 05:12
Yeah, yeah. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 05:15
I'm cutting up father's credit card, and I'm gonna get a job at Macy's. [laughter]
Paula Deming 05:20
Cut to two months later. (as a character) Um, Daddy, can you please send me that credit card back?
Rashawn Scott 05:25
Maybe Aristocrat is my character sheet.
Ross Bryant 05:29
Love that.
cuppycup 05:31
Ross, this doesn't totally fit with the professions that you mentioned. But is it possible that my character is a commercial pilot, like a very fresh new commercial pilot?
Ross Bryant 05:41
Yeah, why not?
cuppycup 05:42
Yeah, just because that character sheet's just staring at me. And I'm sure that skills in Aircraft are going to come in handy. [laughter]
Paula Deming 05:48
It's going to be so fun when we have to do a get together, because you're just here for the layover. You know, like you had a flight yesterday. Tomorrow, you go off on another flight, but we've got you here tonight maybe, you know?
cuppycup 06:00
Yeah, that's perfect. And I feel like he's maybe the clumsiest person you've ever met, so you're all a little worried about him as a pilot. [laughter]
Scott Dorward 06:10
I'm thinking maybe an absolutely terrible advice columnist for the local paper. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 06:18
Excellent.
Rashawn Scott 06:19
Like a "Dear Abby," yes.
Scott Dorward 06:21
Yeah.
Ross Bryant 06:21
Great, great.
cuppycup 06:23
I have chosen the name Jordan Benning. Jordan just felt like perfect to me, for some reason.
Ross Bryant 06:30
That's a great name from one of these things.
Paula Deming 06:33
I'm going to be Lucy Flowers. And it sounds like that's just like a pen name, but it is actually Flowers is my real last name. And it just always felt since I was a kid like...
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 06:44
That, would be great for like, a children's book author.
Paula Deming 06:47
And so I decided, and I've stuck with it, even in the moments where I thought maybe I hate this job. No, I can't change my mind now. I have to keep doing it. [laughter]
Scott Dorward 06:55
I've gone for Marty Shell as a name.
Rashawn Scott 06:55
Great.
cuppycup 06:56
Is it like "Ask Marty?"
Scott Dorward 07:01
Yes. [laughter] Oh God.
Rashawn Scott 07:06
And my name will be Pamela Forge.
Ross Bryant 07:12
Pamela Forge, a Dwarven Ranger. [laughter]
Paula Deming 07:23
Pamela's off to another LARP this weekend. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 07:28
My daddy runs the Renaissance Faire.
Ross Bryant 07:32
Oh right, yes, you're from the Forges. The famous Forge family.
cuppycup 07:36
This array of skills is going to be challenging.
Ross Bryant 07:40
For the pilot? [laughter] I'm just like, how do I get you in a plane?
cuppycup 07:44
That's the entire goal.
Ross Bryant 07:47
Get you in a helicopter. We'll find a way.
cuppycup 07:50
Oh, shoot. I have some Astronomy. Why not?
Ross Bryant 07:53
Oh, good. That'll come in handy.
Paula Deming 07:56
Boy, if y'all need anyone to speak English, I got a 95 in that.
Rashawn Scott 08:00
Alright.
Paula Deming 08:00
So let's go, you know?
cuppycup 08:02
Did we say what city we're in, Ross?
Ross Bryant 08:04
We're in New York. But if you look closely, we're definitely in Toronto. [laughter]
cuppycup 08:14
I think whatever scene you throw us into, Ross, I'm dressed in my pilot's uniform, no matter what.
Ross Bryant 08:21
Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.
Rashawn Scott 08:23
Just always on a layover.
cuppycup 08:24
Yeah, always.
Rashawn Scott 08:25
Just about to leave for work.
Scott Dorward 08:26
I want to believe that you aren't actually a pilot. You just have the uniform and you walk around in it the whole time. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 08:33
That will be the joke.
cuppycup 08:34
Yeah, all you remember is him, like, really struggling through pilot school.
Rashawn Scott 08:38
Oh, God.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 08:39
Like, wow, I can't believe he actually got his wings. It seems like... I'm very surprised.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 08:44
Honestly, they look like the ones they give children. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 08:48
On their first flight, yes.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 08:51
He wanted to feel special. I'm Pamela Forge. [laughter]
cuppycup 08:57
Oh, I like to think you actually have never heard of the airline either. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 09:02
Because it doesn't exist, babe.
Paula Deming 09:03
It's one of those new budget airlines.
cuppycup 09:07
It's Fresh Air. [laughter]
Paula Deming 09:12
Fresh Air? Oh my gosh, yes.
Ross Bryant 09:13
Fresh Air is your...
cuppycup 09:14
Yeah, for sure. It is now.
Scott Dorward 09:16
Oh brilliant.
Rashawn Scott 09:17
Fresh Air. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 09:18
It offers even less amenities than Spirit. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 09:23
You have to stand up.
Paula Deming 09:25
Yeah, it is standing room only.
Ross Bryant 09:27
The world's first standing airplane.
cuppycup 09:29
Yeah, they have the little like, leather handles.
Ross Bryant 09:31
A little bar like, yeah.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 09:34
Well, my first successful book is "Patterson the Duck," [laughter] and I'm planning on doing a whole series about Patterson, and actually, I can't wait to tell Jordan, but I have one inspired by him. It's gonna be "Patterson Becomes a Pilot."
cuppycup 09:52
Oh, amazing!
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 09:54
"Patterson Smells the Roses." Patterson Cooks a Dinner." You know, it's endless. It's unending. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 10:02
Wow, it sounds like you two are really, really good friends. I wonder if that'll ever blossom in anything more. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 10:09
Well, then the two of you should come to the opening of my nightclub called Forgery. [laughter]
Paula Deming 10:17
Yes!
Scott Dorward 10:18
Oh yes.
Paula Deming 10:20
We all just go to Marty all the time for advice.
Rashawn Scott 10:22
Yeah.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 10:23
Marty, I just don't know what to do.
Scott Dorward 10:25
Oh, yeah, and that's why every relationship you've had crashes and burns. [laughter]
Paula Deming 10:31
(disappointed) Ohh.
cuppycup 10:32
I think Jordan even to get unbiased advice, writes in anonymously to Marty. [laughter] Like all the time.
Rashawn Scott 10:40
If anybody needs a Credit Rating, I got you, okay? My stats are stupid. [laughter]
cuppycup 10:48
In a Hallmark movie, you definitely need a high Credit Rating.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 10:51
Is anybody trying to buy a house? [laughter]
Ross Bryant 10:54
I mean, if you just want to turn this into a real estate sim, we can do that. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 11:00
This is Roller Coaster Tycoon, I've been waiting my whole life.
cuppycup 11:05
What paper does Marty write for? Is it a newspaper column?
Scott Dorward 11:09
An independent publication that's trying to get an audience. It's just called The Record and, yeah, it's got a circulation of, assuming you lot buy it, a circulation of at least three. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 11:25
So this plus horror, okay. [laughter] Right. Right, right right. Okay.
Scott Dorward 11:30
Yeah.
Paula Deming 11:31
I mean the horror of human relationships.
Rashawn Scott 11:33
Hello!
Ross Bryant 11:34
I'll say. Sister... dating? Say no more. [laughter] Okay. Are we feeling pretty good about our characters here?
Paula Deming 11:44
I think so.
cuppycup 11:45
Yeah.
Ross Bryant 11:45
We've got Lucy Flowers, a children's author of the Patterson the Duck series.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 11:50
That's right.
Ross Bryant 11:52
We've got Pamela Forge, fashion designer and nightclub impresario, a child of wealth and privilege. [laughter] We've got Marty Shell, advice columnist for The Record. We've got Jordan Benning, a pilot for up-and-coming flight startup, Fresh Air. [laughter]
Scott Dorward 12:09
Oh God. [laughter]
Paula Deming 12:11
They pump like pure oxygen. You know oxygen bars in Vegas? They pump that into the plane.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 12:17
Oh my god, it's Bubblegum Air.
Ross Bryant 12:21
Yeah, oh my god.
cuppycup 12:24
We only fly point-to-point from New York City to Trenton, New Jersey.
Paula Deming 12:29
That's it. That's all you need.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 12:31
But it takes two hours. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 12:32
This is a nightmare. Umm, okay. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 12:42
I don't think I've ever heard you say anything mean, ever aloud. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 12:48
Well get used to it. I'm at my breaking point. [laughter] Okay, yeah. We start in a beautiful blue sky. The spire of the Chrysler Building pierces the clouds as we move down into stock footage of New York City filmed by the second unit of this movie. Because every time that we see an exterior shot in The Day We Met, it is very clearly Toronto, Canada. The CN Tower is often visible over your shoulder, but we move down, down, down past skyscrapers and the hustle and bustle of early 2000s New York. People are moving hither and thither. You can hear, (singing) "feel the rain on your skin." (Rashawn and Paula join singing) "No one else can feel it for you. Only you can let it in." [laughter] As we're going down. The sun is setting. It's beautiful. You can see couples walking by hand in hand. Love is very much in the air. It's a warm summer night as we move under the awning of the pumpinest nightclub on the Lower East Side, Forgery.
Paula Deming 13:56
That's right. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 13:57
[MUSIC: club beat] We move past the bouncer down the line, and you can hear early 2000s club jams pumping from the speakers as people sip dramatically colored cocktails.
Paula Deming 14:08
(singing) That thong, tha-thong, thong thong. (Ross and Rashawn join unintelligible singing).
Ross Bryant 14:16
Sisqó is in full effect. (singing) Got me feeling so crazy right now. [laughter] And we move past the revelers, through the crowd of people dancing, and the crowd parts, and we see nestled in a little private booth in the back of Forgery, a group of friends. A group of friends that have known each other for at least several years. They come to each other with all their problems, professional and especially romantical. No matter what life throws them, no matter what heartbreaks come their way, they can always rely on this little friend group as a safe place to unpack all their woes of what it's like to be single in the big city. Pamela Forge, Marty Shell, Jordan Benning, Lucy Flowers are all there, tucked into a booth, sipping smart cocktails, nursing their respective hearts' wounds. All of you, I think, are just on the prowl, but it's hard out here for a single person. Let's maybe hear about what's been going on in some of your lives as you chat and you wait for the fifth member of your little cadre, Melissa Huntington.
Paula Deming 15:21
Yes.
Ross Bryant 15:22
She's beautiful, but guys, she doesn't know it. [laughter] She's a smart, professional woman. She works at a local ad agency, and she just can't seem to land a man no matter how hard she tries. In fact, she's just about to give up. But you haven't seen her in a while. In fact, you do know that she has some sort of rivals for her affection, and it's kind of been tearing her heart in two. She's kind of been involved in the last few weeks in a love triangle of sorts. But those are her problems. And you are always giving her advice, but she's not here right now. What do you think you're chatting about there in your booth?
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 15:58
You know, the city tried to stop a permit of mine. How come I can't have a panther in the club? Everyone would enjoy that. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 16:07
Well, it might be because it's a little bit dangerous, Pamela.
Paula Deming 16:10
Lucy says as she sips her Appletini. [laughter]
Marty Shell (Scott) 16:14
But isn't that why people come to clubs like this, for the sense of danger?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 16:19
You know what? That's true, and you'll only live once, so.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 16:23
That's exactly what I'm talking about. Hey, Marty, bring out the... Sorry, I meant to say someone else's name, not... [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 16:34
There's so many Martys in New York.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 16:37
So many Martys in New York. Well, I'll have one of my boys bring out the saber-toothed tiger. Maybe that's more sufficient for this club-going. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 16:47
A saber-toothed tiger, what like a stuffed thing? What do you got?
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 16:50
No, I've got an actual live animal to put out into the club. I'll put it in a cage if you're feeling scared. [laughter]
cuppycup 16:58
Jordan gulps his Espresso Martini.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 17:04
Come on, it's New York City. We should be living it up.
Ross Bryant 17:06
Wow, this has really taken a turn. [laughter] And yes, Pamela maybe claps her hands, and descending from the ceiling of Forgery is a brightly lit cage behind the bars of which is some sort of exotic animal that has been very unethically crossbred with certain other creatures to give it extremely long fangs. Because, of course, the saber-toothed tiger is well and truly extinct. [laughter] But not within the walls of Forgery, the hottest club in lower Manhattan.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 17:33
Yes.
Scott Dorward 17:33
Yeah.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 17:36
It's a forgery, it makes sense.
Paula Deming 17:38
Yes.
Ross Bryant 17:39
Exactly.
Scott Dorward 17:41
It's had extensive dental work. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 17:44
Pamela, I love your commitment to the spectacle.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 17:49
You know, I just want everyone to have a fun experience. I've lived life so dully, and it's time for me to, you know, shine bright, just like you, Lucy.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 17:58
Oh. Well, I was going to say that you're inspiring me. I was thinking in my next Patterson the Duck book, I could have a little spectacle, maybe have, like some glitter on some of the pages.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 18:08
Oh, you're so bad. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 18:12
Or a saber-toothed tiger?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 18:13
Oh, "Patterson Meets a Saber-tooth." "Patterson Makes a Friend." Oh, my goodness.
Paula Deming 18:19
And I pull out a little like notebook, and I start jotting down the idea.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 18:22
Patterson makes a friend to saber-toothed tiger, and that's how we learn about animals that go extinct and climate change.
Paula Deming 18:29
Except at this point in time, I think we're just calling it global warming. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 18:36
Climate what?
cuppycup 18:36
Yeah.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 18:37
Can I be honest with all of you for a minute?
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 18:41
Certainly.
Marty Shell (Scott) 18:43
Sure.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 18:43
Just before Melissa gets here, I just, I feel like I need to be vulnerable. Do you feel like whenever Melissa's around, we're always just talking about her and our problems don't matter, like we're side characters in a show or something? [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 18:58
It's like she's in the A story and we're all in the B story.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 19:02
I just think maybe, maybe for once, we could be the A story.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 19:07
I like that. I like that a lot. And you know what, whenever Melissa is always going back and forth between whats-his-face and whats-her-butt, I get it all confused. It's like be consistent for once in your life, Melissa.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 19:21
Like just pick one, you know?
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 19:24
Her life's so interesting. Maybe we just need to get out there and do more, right? Meet more people, mingle.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 19:30
You're just in love with her aren't you, Jordan?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 19:33
(gasp)
cuppycup 19:33
He takes his aviator sunglasses off, [laughter] glares at Pamela.
Paula Deming 19:39
Lucy watches his face as he responds to this very closely.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 19:43
Are you in love with her?
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 19:45
No, don't be ridiculous. She's in a love quadrilateral, or whatever it is. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 19:51
She's in a love polygon and you're, you know, you're an obtuse angle, Jordan. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 19:57
Ooh, I, I kind of like that. Thank you.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 20:02
You're welcome. Let's dance!
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 20:07
Flowers. Flowers, is that you?
Ross Bryant 20:09
Suddenly from just behind you, coming up to you on the dance floor in a gray sharkskin suit and a shirt kind of unbuttoned to the middle chest.
Paula Deming 20:18
Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah.
Ross Bryant 20:18
You see a man with tousled dark hair kind of shimmying up to you.
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 20:22
Saw your book nearly cracked into the Children's Top 10. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 20:26
Oh, hi, yes, Jared. Let's... Wow. Thank you for noticing. Yes, it did.
Ross Bryant 20:33
This is Jared L. Derrigan. He is a children's book author himself. He does the Terence the Turtle series. [laughter]
Paula Deming 20:42
Right.
Ross Bryant 20:42
It has a brand deal with Walmart, and is just absolutely trouncing yours on the charts, so to speak. [laughter] You hate each other.
Paula Deming 20:52
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Ross Bryant 20:52
Or, I don't want to put words in your mouth, but the rivalry is crackling.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 20:55
Well, you know, it's always nice to have growth still available to you. I'd hate to get at a point where the only place to go is down. [laughter]
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 21:05
Yes, I suppose. Man's reach must exceed one's grasp or what's a heaven for, huh? [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 21:13
Yeah. Definitely.
Paula Deming 21:15
Lucy's like...
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 21:16
Yeah, I know. Mm-hmm. (clears throat) So, what are you doing here?
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 21:22
Forgery is just one of the hottest clubs in the city, don't you know? Didn't expect to see you here, though.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 21:28
I'm best friends with the owner, didn't you know? Pamela, this is Jared L. Derrigan. You might not know his books, Terence the Turtle.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 21:38
Oh, hello. I'm not familiar with your book, but I'm glad you're in the right place. (privately) Lucy, do we give a fuck about this guy or not? [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 21:47
(quietly) No, he sucks. At first, I thought he's cute and he has a great accent. But then I realized, ew.
Scott Dorward 21:53
Marty's desperately pushing a Terence the Turtle book down deeper inside his briefcase. His little courier bag. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 22:02
Yeah.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 22:02
Terence the Turtle, that's a terrible name. You should have gone with something else like Marty Shell. [laughter]
Scott Dorward 22:09
(exasperated) Aww.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 22:11
Well, Jared, what brings you to the club? I don't think I've seen you here before.
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 22:15
Just blowing off some steam after the recent sale of "Terence Turtle's Bathtime Adventure." [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 22:22
It was, honestly, I respect you enough to say it was a damn good one. But don't worry, Patterson the Duck will get there.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 22:31
Oh, I think I saw that one at Borders, actually. Didn't... you had glitter on the shell, didn't you?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 22:36
You did? They put glitter on the shell?
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 22:39
Yes, the book has a sort of a tactile quality.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 22:42
(clears throat) Wonderful. That's great because sensory experiences are so important for young children. That's why in my next Patterson the Duck book, the duck is going to actually have real feathers for them to be able to feel as they flip the pages.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 22:57
Wow. I've never heard such innovation in literary circles before. Wow, that's incredible, Lucy.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 23:04
Thank you, Pamela.
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 23:05
Just think about how high you could ascend, Miss Flowers if you gave away all the sort of social preachiness that you do in your books, and gave into raw commerce. This is why Terence the Turtle gets the sort of brand affiliate deals that he has.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 23:19
Well, I want children to be, you know, edified by my books, and to grow and to learn about the world, not just have things sold to them.
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 23:28
Hmm.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 23:28
I would hate to sell myself to some power that might grant me success, sure. But what kind of havoc could it wreak upon the world?
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 23:39
Well, I suppose we'll just agree to disagree.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 23:41
I guess so.
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 23:42
We're opposites, it seems, and will never come to an agreement, ever. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 23:47
No opposites could never attract, ugh! [laughter]
Jared L. Derrigan (Ross) 23:50
In another life, I might have a lot to learn from you, Lucy Flowers. But tonight's not that night, did you see the tiger? Ta-ta. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 23:52
And he kind of dances back into the crowd.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 23:57
See, I told you, the tiger... it gets people in the door and makes them stay.
Paula Deming 24:06
I just drain the rest of the green liquid in my Appletini glass.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 24:11
Another round.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 24:12
Ugh!
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 24:14
You should just ask him out, Lucy. He's clearly into you.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 24:17
You think he's into me?
Marty Shell (Scott) 24:19
What? No, no that's a terrible idea. I mean, whoever said opposites... Well, I know you just said opposites attract, but who else? I mean, no, no, stupid, it's stupid. It never works. It never works. I mean, people always say that like it's good relationship advice, but honestly relationships are built on mutual trust, respect and shared values, and you clearly have nothing in common.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 24:44
No, but he is hot.
Marty Shell (Scott) 24:45
Well yes. Yes, alright.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 24:47
Well.
Marty Shell (Scott) 24:48
Well, maybe a fling then. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 24:51
And he's, you know, he's negging you. Isn't that kind of sexy in a way?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 24:55
Ahh, it's like, I need his approval, but I don't want his approval, but I do want his approval. What do you think, Jordan? [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 25:03
I mean, he said you need to think about ascending. I'm a pilot.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 25:08
Oh.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 25:10
We could ascend anytime you'd like. I could get you a half price ticket.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 25:14
Oh, a half price ticket. [laughter]
Rashawn Scott 25:16
Half price!
cuppycup 25:17
At Fresh Air, we have a friends and family deal. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 25:20
As this crackling repartee is going around the table. [laughter] Pamela, you see someone like kind of bumping and tripping their way through the crowd in a charmingly awkward way. [MUSIC: goofy groove] He has a collared shirt that is sort of rumpled and looks out of place in this club environment. His hair is tousled and falling over his forehead in dark curls. Imagine a young Mark Ruffalo, but he's a nerd. He's a dork.
Paula Deming 25:45
Done!
Ross Bryant 25:46
And he kind of bumps into someone like,
Keith Philby (Ross) 25:48
Oh, sorry.
Ross Bryant 25:49
And as he makes his way towards you, you know that this is Keith Philby. He is one of the members of the sort of romance quadrilateral, I believe you spoke of. [laughter] Or the romance triangle with Melissa Huntington. He's always hanging around. In fact, you notice, tucked under his arm, he has a bunch of poster boards with big messages written on them as he kind of bumps his way through the crowd and jostles his way towards your table. [SFX: stumbling feet and a man yelling "hey!"]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 26:16
Keith, I've told you thousands of times, check those nerd boards at the door.
Keith Philby (Ross) 26:21
Oh, I'm sorry. I, uhh... It's so loud in here. I didn't want to check them. I was sort of hoping that Melissa was here. Is she not?
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 26:32
No, Melissa's not here. The last time I saw her, she was with you, or at least was talking about you. Any progress in your commitment.
Keith Philby (Ross) 26:41
Really? She was talking about me?
Ross Bryant 26:43
He kind of slides into your table and kind of scrunches himself up next to Jordan.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 26:47
Well, she mentioned that she was obviously torn between you and the other one. What progress have you made of declaring your love this time?
Keith Philby (Ross) 26:56
Well, I've been trying to for the past, for almost the past week, I realized that there's so much that I've been meaning to say that I just haven't been able to put into words. We've been friends for so long, and she's always been just so out of reach. I never wanted to, or, I should say, I never had the courage to really step out of the boundaries of what our relationship was and declare how I felt. I needed to do a grand gesture, and that's why I made these.
Ross Bryant 27:24
And kind of lifts up his poster boards. And it's clear that he's got... one just says, like "to me, you are the best in the world." [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 27:33
Okay. Keith, a grand... [laughter]
Keith Philby (Ross) 27:37
I was gonna go to her workplace and sort of hold these up outside a glassed in conference room or something.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 27:43
Maybe not at work.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 27:44
Keith, she works on the 15th floor. How is anybody going to see your signs from up there?
Keith Philby (Ross) 27:50
Right, right? I should do it at her house.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 27:52
No, no, no, no, no. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 27:55
Keith, did she say that she wanted a grand gesture? Is she telling you her love languages, or is this something you're fabricating?
Keith Philby (Ross) 28:02
Well, that's the point of a grand... you can't ask for a grand gesture that undermines the grandness of the gesture. You have to take a risk. Pamela, you have to take a risk, or else the gesture falls flat.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 28:14
Oh, I know about risks.
Rashawn Scott 28:15
And I point to the saber-toothed tiger in the middle of the room, doing the stanky leg. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 28:23
It's paws groping through the bars. It looks as though it could probably slink through them.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 28:28
I can't believe they wouldn't allow you to have a panther, but they let you have the saber-toothed tiger. It's amazing.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 28:33
Well, shhh. I know a guy in New Jersey who was able to help me out with that. [laughter] But Keith, Keith, honey, putting yourself out there, being this vulnerable. Oh, it's not a good look, honey.
Keith Philby (Ross) 28:47
What are you supposed to do? Now, Marty, you're an advice columnist. What should someone do? I'm sorry, let me put it in terms you understand, Lonely on the Lower East Side asks... [laughter]
Marty Shell (Scott) 29:00
Well Keith, Keith, Keith. I mean, it sounds to me like your biggest problem there is romantic rivalry. I mean, Melissa will figure out how she feels about you at some stage, but maybe what you really need to do is sabotage your rival.
Keith Philby (Ross) 29:15
Oh, wow.
Ross Bryant 29:17
And he kinda like...
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 29:18
Now that's something I can get behind a little friendly competition.
Marty Shell (Scott) 29:22
Yeah.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 29:23
You're so much different in print, Marty, [laughter] than you are here in person. I admire that though.
Keith Philby (Ross) 29:30
I mean, I hardly know how I would, uh, I would be able to sabotage it, though.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 29:35
Well, tell us about the other one. Why is he so great? And why can't Melissa make up her mind, a pros and cons list, possibly.
Keith Philby (Ross) 29:43
You don't know, Pamela? I mean, my rival's Roger Madigan.
Ross Bryant 29:49
Of course you know who Roger Madigan is. He's one of the most eligible bachelors in all of New York.
Marty Shell (Scott) 29:55
Oh yeah, yeah, Roger Madigan, yeah, you should just give up now, Keith.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 29:58
Oh yes. They call him Mr. Large.
Paula Deming 30:02
Mr. Large, yes. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 30:04
Absolutely. He's known as Mr. Large because he's a real estate developer who builds large. [laughter] And in fact, his office and penthouse is at the top of the Keystone Tower, one of the tallest new builds in New York. It has a giant glassed-in penthouse on top with a helicopter pad, and he builds big and lives large.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 30:24
Wow.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 30:25
Yeah, Keith, I just don't know how you can live up to Roger, unless it just turns out that he's shallow and you're genuine. Maybe just be yourself and hope that in time, she'll learn to like the nice guy.
Keith Philby (Ross) 30:38
Huh, that sounds like an empty platitude, but maybe I should just be myself. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 30:44
Just be yourself, just like Patterson the Duck learned in my book, "Patterson Learns to Be Himself".
Keith Philby (Ross) 30:51
Oh yeah, it's like I was just reading in "Terence the Turtle Comes out of his Shell." [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 30:54
No. [laughter]
Paula Deming 30:55
Lucy's face goes deadly serious.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 31:00
The long con has always worked out for me.
Marty Shell (Scott) 31:03
Being yourself is a terrible idea. It's a terrible idea. No one's interested in you, Keith, they're just interested in who you can pretend to be. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 31:13
Marty, I just don't know that that's true. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 31:17
Marty, I have some ideas about increasing your circulation. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 31:21
Marty, we're gonna switch you to just some club soda, getting a little in your cups, as they say.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 31:30
Keith, if you want to be like more of who you already are.
cuppycup 31:33
And he kind of nudges Keith in the ribs, since he's sitting next to him, and he's gonna... he has this little keychain shaped like an airplane, and he pops it open to show him the cocaine inside. [laughter]
Keith Philby (Ross) 31:45
Oh my gosh. Is this what you mean when you say you like to fly, Jordan. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 31:59
Yeah, come on, Keith, I wouldn't lead you astray. I mean, we go way back. You remember (laughing) the day we met.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 32:07
You girls are gonna need to go into the powder room if you're gonna do some snow. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 32:14
Yeah.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 32:15
Not out here.
cuppycup 32:16
I love the idea that it wasn't inconspicuous at all. [laughter] Yeah, everyone's getting a good look.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 32:22
Whoa.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 32:23
I thought it was nice. I used to use an Altoids tin. [laughter]
Keith Philby (Ross) 32:28
No, it's great, Jordan, I realize that's probably fine for you, but it would just make my problems worse, I think. I mean, I showed up at her workplace, I slipped past security, went up the elevator.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 32:41
Oh, Keith.
Keith Philby (Ross) 32:42
I was just doing what I thought I should do based on advice I read in your column, Marty.
Marty Shell (Scott) 32:46
Oh, yeah.
Keith Philby (Ross) 32:47
It turns out that Melissa hasn't been at her job in almost two weeks.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 32:52
Wait, what?
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 32:53
She was working on the big pasta account. That's been her whole life.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 32:56
Yeah, she was so excited about the big pasta account.
Keith Philby (Ross) 33:00
She's rolling out the huge pasta account this week. The people up on her floor are going nuts.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 33:06
Well, should we call her?
Keith Philby (Ross) 33:09
I've been trying to reach her on her BlackBerry all week, but none of the messages are getting through, I guess.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 33:16
It's really hard to type on those things. Just give her time.
Keith Philby (Ross) 33:19
I don't know. I like the buttons. I like the satisfying click they make.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 33:23
Oh like the kind of tactile feel. Yeah, some people are really into that, Keith.
Keith Philby (Ross) 33:25
Yeah.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 33:26
It's really nice.
Keith Philby (Ross) 33:27
Yeah, like the glitter on the back of Terence the Turtle.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 33:30
Now you shut your mouth, Keith.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 33:32
(upset) You know what?
Paula Deming 33:34
I just say that...
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 33:35
I think I'm ready to go. Maybe I'll go to Melissa's place and check in on her in person, like a good friend, get away from all this Terence the Turtle talk.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 33:45
I think that's a good idea.
Marty Shell (Scott) 33:46
You see Keith when I say you shouldn't be yourself, this is what I mean. [laughter]
Keith Philby (Ross) 33:52
Boy, I guess I got a lot to learn. Be yourself. Don't be yourself. Cocaine. Many roads lay before Keith. [laughter]
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 34:03
Well, the cocaine is the easiest road. I've got it right here. Just let me know, Keith, just give me the sign.
Ross Bryant 34:10
But I heard that you were, or at least Lucy was going to try to go to Melissa's place.
Paula Deming 34:16
Yes.
Ross Bryant 34:16
Is that something that everybody would like to do? Or perhaps just Lucy? Of course, I'll say that people can split the party early and often. [laughter]
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 34:24
I think it would be a good idea to go to her apartment, because she was supposed to meet us here.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 34:29
Yeah, she's very late.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 34:30
She never misses a cocktail hour.
Ross Bryant 34:34
Yeah, this is a monthly ritual for y'all and she's not here.
Jordan Benning (cuppycup) 34:37
Does it make more sense to go to Roger's place? She's obviously at Rogers place.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 34:43
Uhh, well.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 34:43
That's a good question.
Pamela Forge (Rashawn) 34:46
Alright, Jordan, you and I will go to Roger's and scope it out. And Marty, Lucy, maybe you go to Melissa's. You have her spare key. The door is always unlocked, I know that. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 34:56
You just walk on in. She's so trusting.
Marty Shell (Scott) 34:58
Sure.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 34:59
Yeah, we can go. Marty, will you come with me?
Marty Shell (Scott) 35:01
Oh, yeah.
Ross Bryant 35:02
[SFX: taxi parking] So let's see a quick montage of a yellow cab pulling up outside of Forgery. [MUSIC: playful lounge] Everybody piling in. Jared L. Derrigan sweeps past you and his cold eyes lock on yours, Lucy, as you pass by. But is there a subtle warmth underneath them? Is this rivalry masking something deeper?
Paula Deming 35:21
Do we only pretend like we hate each other because we're scared of how much we love each other? [laughter]
Ross Bryant 35:27
Impossible, impossible.
Paula Deming 35:29
No, that couldn't be it. That couldn't be it.
Ross Bryant 35:30
[SFX: taxi driving] As the cab scoots across town. But of course, we are in Toronto. Who knows how far you actually went or where? [laughter] But let's see you now. Bing! [SFX: elevator doors opening] Coming out of an elevator in a long hallway of smart apartments, and you know that down the hall to the right is the apartment of ad wizard Melissa Huntington, lucky in ad campaigns, unlucky in love.
Paula Deming 35:56
Aww.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 35:56
Alright, Marty, let's just march on over there and knock on that door.
Marty Shell (Scott) 36:03
Sure.
Scott Dorward 36:04
I'll just stand there expectantly and wait for you to do it. [laughter]
Paula Deming 36:09
I do it. I walk on over and assuming that the door just looks normal, you know, it's not ajar or anything, I knock. [SFX: knocking on door]
Paula Deming 36:15
Yeah, there is no answer.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 36:17
[SFX: knocking continues] Melissa! It's Lucy and Marty. Let us in.
Ross Bryant 36:27
[MUSIC: romantic pop] The door behind you opens up [SFX: door opening] and a guy who kind of looks like a young Matthew McConaughey in a towel, he's just come out of the shower. [laughter]
Paula Deming 36:39
I knew he would be in a towel. This is my favorite world we're living in right now. [laughter] Like, rom-com world. Let's never stop this game. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 36:46
And he pops his head out, and he cracks the door, but just enough to show you his insanely chiseled torso. The water of the shower just like throwing beams of light off of his tanned torso.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:00
(clears throat) Oh, hello.
Towel Guy (Ross) 37:00
Oh, sorry, you looking for Melissa?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:04
Uh, yes, yes, we were.
Towel Guy (Ross) 37:08
I was wondering if you could tell me where she is, because I haven't seen her in a while.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:15
You haven't?
Towel Guy (Ross) 37:16
No.
Marty Shell (Scott) 37:18
Hmm.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:19
Oh, like, how long is a while?
Towel Guy (Ross) 37:21
Gosh, I suppose maybe it was a couple weeks. I was, uh...
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:26
Oh.
Towel Guy (Ross) 37:26
I was gonna come over and watch a DVD, but she never came knocking.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:32
Oh, okay, well, that's interesting. Thank you for the information, I guess. we don't know where she is either. Should we try and go into her apartment, Marty?
Marty Shell (Scott) 37:43
Oh.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:44
Because the plants in there would be dying.
Marty Shell (Scott) 37:47
Yeah, you're right. It's only the responsible thing to do, yep, of course, of course.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:52
Yes, as friends.
Marty Shell (Scott) 37:53
I'm sure she's got to leave a spare key around here somewhere.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 37:56
You know, at one point I thought maybe I would be like a mystery writer, and then I realized I was way out of my league. But I've read a lot of mystery novels, maybe I can like jimmy the lock.
Ross Bryant 38:08
This guy is still listening to this whole conversation. [laughter]
Towel Guy (Ross) 38:12
Just gonna bust in the door?
Paula Deming 38:14
Well, what would you do, towel guy? [laughter]
Towel Guy (Ross) 38:18
Please call me, Bo.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 38:20
Bo. Hi. You don't have a neighborly spare key to Melissa's place, do you?
Ross Bryant 38:27
You get the sense that he doesn't know you. You might have to persuade him, if you were going to get a key to just walk into someone else's apartment.
Paula Deming 38:36
I could try to charm him. I have a 50 in Charm. So...
Ross Bryant 38:39
Yeah, there you go.
Paula Deming 38:40
In theory.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 38:41
Maybe you don't know me, but my name is Lucy Flowers. I have known Melissa for years and years. And also, if you have like nieces or nephews or younger brothers and sisters, maybe you know my books, Patterson the Duck?
Paula Deming 38:54
Ooh! I rolled a 20. Yeah, that's a hard success.
Towel Guy (Ross) 38:59
You write the Patterson the Duck series?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 39:01
I do, yes.
Towel Guy (Ross) 39:02
I'm a fireman, but I work weekends at a... [laughter] volunteering at a...
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 39:07
You volunteer? Wow.
Towel Guy (Ross) 39:10
At a youth outreach organization, and we read your books all the time.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 39:14
Wow, that's so special. Thank you for telling me, and it's just so nice to meet a fan.
Ross Bryant 39:21
He reaches into his towel and pulls out the key. [laughter]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 39:28
Thank you, Bo. Maybe, um, you know, just like, look me up sometime or something. I don't know. [laughter]
Towel Guy (Ross) 39:35
Gosh, uh, I suppose I could try to look up a big city author, but, uh, you just come knocking on my door any time you want, Miss Flowers.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 39:43
Oh, okay. Okay, well, I do know where you live now. (laughs)
Towel Guy (Ross) 39:46
(fake laugh)
Ross Bryant 39:51
The door's slowly shutting. [laughter] Shut. [SFX: door closes]
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 39:56
Look Marty, now we don't have to break in.
Marty Shell (Scott) 39:59
Okay, well what were you waiting for?
Paula Deming 40:01
[MUSIC: mystery club groove] Alright, I'll unlock the door.
Ross Bryant 40:01
Great. It pops right open, and you walk into a gorgeously appointed New York City apartment. It is the height of early 2000s fashion. We've got gorgeous furnishings, big artworks on the wall, images maybe from some of her ad campaigns, or, like archival ad campaigns are posted up on a corkboard under one of those iMac computers that has a big, like purple bubble on the back. There's a, like a kitchen island and a little balcony looking out over beautiful Manhattan by night. Things look in order here, but it does not look lived in.
Marty Shell (Scott) 40:43
Melissa?
Ross Bryant 40:44
Yeah, you receive no reply.
Marty Shell (Scott) 40:48
Guess she's not home.
Paula Deming 40:50
Are there like plants in there that might be like dying? Anything that does prove like, yes, she's been gone for a while. She's not taking care of things.
Ross Bryant 40:59
What an astute observation. There's no roll necessary to see that, yes, the plants that are around this well-appointed space are drooping quite a bit.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 41:09
This is so strange Marty.
Scott Dorward 41:11
Yeah, she wouldn't have gone out of town without telling us.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 41:15
I don't think so.
Paula Deming 41:16
Does she have a wall calendar we could look at that maybe has, you know, like a date circled or something marked on it?
Ross Bryant 41:24
Yeah, there is a wall calendar pinned up next to that corkboard. You can see that there's lookbook kind of swatches all over this corkboard for the ad campaign. You can see pictures of fusilli and penne. God, this pasta campaign.
Paula Deming 41:37
She's working on the pasta.
Ross Bryant 41:38
But there's also a calendar, and it's a calendar where each page has a different movie poster on it. And you're looking at a movie poster for "Breakfast at Tiffany's" with the current month. And you can see there today's date with "drinks at The Forgery" written on it, as well as lots of other appointments to keep going back up the rest of the month.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 41:59
Marty, this is strange. It looks like she was planning on being at all of these things, but she hasn't shown up for any of them.
Marty Shell (Scott) 42:05
Yeah, maybe something's come up. Maybe, I think she was getting close with Roger. You don't suppose she's... Yeah, maybe she's just 'round at his place. Maybe she's got swept up in this whole whirlwind romance, and they're just, you know, they've just spent the last few days there ordering in takeaway and... I mean that's gotta be it, right?
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 42:28
It's gotta be it. She wouldn't just drop everything and disappear, right? She's just caught up in love. I mean, that's the dream, right? To get so caught up in love that you drop all of your responsibilities and the rest of your life falls apart. That's it. That's how you know it's right. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 42:46
Why don't people make a Spot Hidden?
Paula Deming 42:48
Oh no, no, no. I'm so distracted by thinking about what would actually be true love that I rolled a 97. [laughter]
Paula Deming 42:48
Oh my god.
Scott Dorward 42:48
Oh god.
Scott Dorward 42:50
Oh, dear.
Paula Deming 42:51
It's at least close to a fumble if it's not a fumble.
Ross Bryant 42:58
Okay.
Scott Dorward 42:58
It depends what your skill level is.
Ross Bryant 43:03
What's your skill?
Paula Deming 43:04
That's true. 35.
Scott Dorward 43:06
That's a fumble.
Ross Bryant 43:07
That's a fumble. So that's a fumbled Spot Hidden. [laughter] Interesting. Okay, we're gonna come back to that. Let's see who, if anybody succeeded, if you want to try.
Scott Dorward 43:17
Yeah, I got an extreme.
Paula Deming 43:19
Thank goodness. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 43:22
On this desk by the bubbly, colorful iMac, you tap the mouse and it (makes electronic sound) hums noisily to life, and you're looking at her email, and you can see some emails, a lot of work emails like, "where are you? Jerry from Prego is breathing down my neck." And if you continue to scroll, since I think you got that so well, you can see that there's emails from Keith there, like little kind of notes where he's clumsily expressing friendship, trying to meet up, where he's never really speaking his truth.
Paula Deming 43:46
Oh, Keith.
Ross Bryant 43:48
There's an email. The username is just a series of numbers at hotmail. And you, if you open it up, it just says, numeral C, big letter U, numeral 2, night. "C U 2night." And this email came two weeks ago to the day, today.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 44:22
I wonder if I'll ever fall in love. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 44:27
Your eye is caught, Lucy Flowers, [laughter] by a... There's a bunch of, like, business cards and things all over the desk. Things pinned up, like I said, lots of pasta stuff and other things she was working on. But there's other, you're just kind of poking around, musing on love, and you can see like another little mash note from Keith that you push out of the way. [MUSIC: ethereal synth] And your eyes suddenly light on this incredibly beautiful and ornate business card. Do you know what a Penrose triangle is? It's an optical illusion. It's a triangle that seems to be in multiple planes at once. It's one of those optical illusions where if you trace the outside of this triangle, you'd wind up on the inside of it. It's like a three dimensional optical illusion.
Paula Deming 45:13
Oh, yes, okay. Mm-hmm.
Ross Bryant 45:15
And it's one of these, and there's something about it that you've never seen it so intricately rendered, and your eye is sort of caught in it.
Paula Deming 45:23
Yeah.
Ross Bryant 45:24
As you're musing on love. Falling in love. Will you ever fall in love? Falling. Falling. And there's something about this triangle that is beckoning you to fall into it. There is something about the mathematical precision and paradox of it that is just drawing your eye into its center.
Paula Deming 45:46
I think even physically, my face is it's like on the card is on the counter, and I've got, like, my hands suddenly on either side of the card, and my face is slowly, even like, getting closer and closer to the card until my nose is almost touching the card itself.
Ross Bryant 46:03
Yeah, your nose is almost touching it, as you feel just kind of drawn to it. And there is something about the... yes, the mathematics and paradox. The reality, the unreal. You can just feel that in a way that you're not looking at a triangle, you're looking at yourself. That you can describe everything as it were, in numbers, and that all that is rational can be paradoxical and irrational. The whole room feels like it's buckling around you, spiraling towards the center of this image. Please roll Sanity for me. [laughter]
Paula Deming 46:40
Oh, I'm pretty sane. Yay. I have a pretty sane character. 59 under 70.
Ross Bryant 46:48
Great. You just lose one point of Sanity.
Paula Deming 46:50
Okay.
Ross Bryant 46:51
And you snap out of it. This image just kind of took your breath away for a moment.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 46:56
(gasp)
Ross Bryant 46:56
And not only that, it sort of gave you a sense of vertigo.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 47:01
Oh, I feel a little bit like I'm getting a migraine.
Marty Shell (Scott) 47:04
Oh. Sit down for a moment. I'm just gonna see whether I can find out more about this email.
Lucy Flowers (Paula) 47:10
Okay, yeah.
Ross Bryant 47:11
Now I don't know what the nature of your character sheets... If there's a skill that one of you have that you could parlay as a tech or...
Scott Dorward 47:18
I've got some Computer Use.
Ross Bryant 47:20
Computer Use would be perfect.
Scott Dorward 47:22
Yeah, yeah. I mean, for a start, I just want to see whether there's any more emails from this address. But yeah, just see whether I can work out anything about the sender. And I have rolled, no, I've rolled 71 over 40. You know what? You know what? I'm gonna push this. I'm gonna push this.
cuppycup 47:42
Yes.
Paula Deming 47:42
(chanting) Push the roll!
Ross Bryant 47:43
(chanting) Push the roll!
Scott Dorward 47:47
Obviously, I'm being careful here because I don't want to disturb anything on Melissa's computer. This is her computer. It's not mine. I don't want to pry in and find something embarrassing on here, or anything like that, or, you know, anything too personal. I'm just looking for this email sender, but I'm going to abandon all caution at this stage and just start rooting through all her documents, looking for anything that's going to give me a clue as to who's been emailing her.
Ross Bryant 48:16
Okay, so as Lucy is like nursing her sudden sense of migraine, Marty Shell is like sweeping things off the table and just like totally invading Melissa Huntington's privacy. Please push that roll.
Scott Dorward 48:31
And I got hard success.
Paula Deming 48:32
Yeah.
Scott Dorward 48:34
I'm kind of disappointed that I didn't fail. [laughter]
Ross Bryant 48:39
Me too. Now, I'm not the most... Ross is not the most technically savvy person in the world, but I think that maybe Marty, in terms of early computing, is maybe a crack whiz at some of this kind of stuff. By virtue of writing and submitting your work to local publications and being a sort of net runner out there on the early info superhighway, and you're able to take this string of numbers and try to figure out were any other emails sent. You're not finding much in the inbox. It looks as though a lot of emails have been deleted. She keeps her inbox well and truly organized. Maybe you go on AltaVista [laughter] and drop this sequence of numbers in, [SFX: keyboard typing] and are just rooting around trying to find if there's any meaning to this, to this sequence. [MUSIC: ethereal synth] And yeah, a website comes up with this sequence of numbers, which, if you click on it, suddenly the screen fills with pop ups (makes sound of rapid appearing). And one immediately arrests your attention, and it's just a black window of a web page with a scroll of numbers going by, filling, filling, filling the screen. And as they do, they suddenly begin to kind of move and shift, and begin to kind of animate a crude Flash animation as the sequence of numbers coalesces into a Penrose triangle.
Paula Deming 48:42
(gasp) Uh oh.
Marty Shell (Scott) 49:14
Hey! Hey, Lucy. Have you ever seen anything like this before? [laughter]